This weekend here in Alberta was Open Farm Days, it is a two day collaborative event that takes place all over Alberta. Over 100 farms participate it is a backstage pass to meet the farmer, experience Ag-tourism in Alberta and taste local foods direct from the producer. To experience the farm and understand where their food comes from.
I gave Florence the choice to either go see sheep and learn about sheering the sheep and how they make their wool. Or we could go see bison and take a wagon ride out into the pasture to see them up close.
She choose bison of course.
So we went to the HGB Bison Ranch just outside Olds, Alberta. They have been there for 30 years raising their heard. We learned about the two types of bison they have on the ranch, we saw babies, we learned about what they eat and if they are aggressive or not. It was all really interesting, for me. We took a wagon ride out into the pasture, which I was a little worried about as it is a 20minute ride packed with other people, and easy access to jumping out.
There was a bunch of other families with us, most of which live in our area. Parker had been woken up early and the day before we went to the city so his naps had been messed up. So as a child that needs his sleep at its set times, he was a little cranky to begin with. I had treats in my purse though so I thought we might be able to make it. All the women were chatting with me and their kids are around the same ages. There was one family though, I looked at her looking at Parker in his slow climb into freak out stage and thought to myself, wow judge much. They had three kids, two younger boys and she was carrying their daughter in a wrap. She hadn’t said a word to me but I put judgement on her. Parker just lost his absolute mind when the driver stopped by the heard to get out and tell us about the bison and see if he could get one over to us. Florence had done well up till this point but when we stopped her first reaction was “oh we can get off now”. She had no fear of just getting off the wagon and would have obviously just ran over to pet one. Thankfully that didn’t happen.
What did happen is that Parker screamed at the top of his lungs, planked and punched me in the face. All the treats were gone. He wanted a nap, and we were no longer moving.
The mom I had cast my judgement on without saying one word to each other smiled at me. Not a condescending smile. A I know what your going through don’t worry about it smile. All the moms did. A wagon full of women that I had never met just smiled and told me about how we all go through it and not to worry. One offered more snacks, and the one I judged told me that her boys used to be the same and their third the daughter was so calm and mellow she was shocked and not used to it.
None of this conversation obviously helped Parker, but what it did help was me. I am calming to the public crying and screaming because there is nothing to be done. Not every kid you see freaking out in public is a spoiled brat. They are freaking out because they are hungry, tired, sad, not able to verbalize what is happening to them. Their little brains cant comprehend how to explain their feelings. Parker isn’t talking enough to say,
“mom I know I ate a huge breakfast a hour ago and just ate two packs of snacks but I am growing and tired and I am still hungry and don’t want to be stuck on this wagon with no sense of time or understanding of when I am going to get off.”
I am thankful for the multiple women I have had brief interactions with this weekend, who smiled at me and told me stories of their kids, and shared in an understanding. So I really need to start showing more of that too. Because this mom I cast my judgement on hadn’t even said a word, her kids weren’t’ acting up it was mine and I passed my discomfort onto her. So I collectively apologize to all those moms whom I have past quiet judgment on. I need to follow what I preach.
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Xoxo
Simone
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